If you’re like the rest of us, you wake up earlier than you would have wanted and, since you first open your eyes, your mental secretary writes down in your mental notebook all things you have to do today, things you missed yesterday, and things you need to take care of by next week. This is the beginning of the end; it’s when you don’t hear, see, or feel anything else but a strong desire to get back to work as fast as possible. This obsession that gets you ready for the week’s marathon activates your well-known mental routine sometimes referred to as “autopilot”. Then you notice that, in just a couple of hours, it’s Tuesday and, before you know it, it’s Wednesday, then Thursday. Friday doesn’t even pass and your weekend agenda is already full with all those things you neglected all week; they are now screaming back at you.
Is this schedule familiar to you? I bet it is. Maybe you even wondered how long you will be able to take part in this crazy race that’s not only time consuming, but also prevents you from taking a breath of freedom and hear your loved one’s voice. Weeks, months, and years pass and you detach from the truly healthy things in you life. You become captive in a world where you don’t have to think, feel, or express yourself because if you do so, you might lose first spot in the competition for the country’s most detached citizen.
Now, just as you’re reading this, you’re probably thinking ‘This is just a silly reading that struggles to highlight aspects that you don’t really need,’ an awareness state that could help you see, hear, feel, and then choose so that you will notice that you are not a mere pawn on the chessboard. Why do you tell yourself that? Is it because you trust yourself? Because you are your most trustworthy confidant? Or is it because you just like control more than you’d think and love to go wild? You already know the answer to that. You are just afraid to stop because you can’t tell the joy to explore and be curious about every living moment.
I hope this doesn’t sound too “ethereal” (that’s the word I use to differentiate scientific psychology from other so-called psychologies), because all I’m doing is encouraging your wisdom to regain its rights and challenging your mind to accept it is not as good and important as it was used to believe. Another so-called truth is that we are all very good at psychology, thus we don’t need such words of wisdom. The sad reality shows us that we are indeed very good at misleading and sabotaging our own selves.
We need to accept that the science of the soul can help us get to know our inside universe and discover wounds that go deeper and deeper with every moment of neglecting it and lack of awareness. That’s what the autopilot does: it drags you away from your wounds, those wounds you try to run from, but don’t succeed; you burry your head in the sand, pretending you know what it’s about. But honestly speaking we shouldn’t do that anymore, neither I, nor you; now we can choose to see who we really are and befriend our souls, regardless of how flawed our mind and society tell us they are. We most certainly need courage to take a peek in our inside darkness, but who was born without courage? No one. The difference is that some of us gave it up and gave up ourselves in the process. But courage is a matter of practice, and I’m saying this because I tried it.
It is worth trying one “innocent” psychological experiment. Starting tomorrow, for a whole month, talk to yourself at least 15 minutes a day. I can assure you it will be the most difficult task you’ve ever had to deal with in a while. And you know why? Because you are bored with yourself and you need to get past this superficial layer in order to see deep down inside all those unknown, unthough-of, and interesting things. That’s where your true self lies, and if you are not curious to discover it, why would others be curious?
If you want to do something wild, set a weekly meeting with someone you know. Spend one hour with him and her. Respect each other’s time and divide this hour in half. For 30 minutes, listen to what the other one has to say. Don’t use your mind to show you are better at uncovering the world’s mysteries. Listen with your eyes and ears like it would be the first time you’re hearing those things. Allow yourself to notice how you feel and live without analyzing. The switch places. Let the words flow and tell him or her about everything that had an impact on you, about everything that brought you sorrow or immense joy in the last week, without being concerned of the other one’s judgment. You should try to be vulnerable, childish, and even a bit silly. After those 60 minutes, you say good-bye and you see each other the next week. Don’t worry about what the other one is thinking or saying. He or she will be going through the same process.
What I wish now for you and I is to experience that autopilot mode as rarely as possible. Until next time, let’s enjoy life more.